Why men have extramarital affairs?
Speak about a loaded matter that no one wants to speak about, that’s it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on ever since the beginning of the world. Affairs can be loaded with evils, cause sadness, and other harms. Plus you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness thing, money, age difference, religious upbringing, remorse, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I will classify an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, married date.
Why do people have affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking affair. I suppose mainly though it is just the human nature, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
In nature we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and exciting, and sex makes us get away the real world for a short period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Someone are able to switch the longing on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos humanity has erected against affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will overcome their fears and make them risk the wrath of not only their relatives, but society as well. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is awfully pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not injure your relatives or anyone else? You would need to minimize the risk you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major group, very big in fact. There are many couples whose marriage is over, except they feel comfortable in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to consider. Your finances are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay jointly besides love and sex.
Bodily reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An extra-marital affair from time to time solves the problem while keeping the marriage intact.
Avoidance, sorrowfully this is a common reason I fear. One or the other, as a rule the husband is sexually neglecting his lady for a number of reasons. As a male I truly am grateful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “hot milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, maybe compassion is gone, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Maybe we have just grown apart, our common interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Maybe I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair